


A Touch of Mistletoe

by CloudXMK



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Also Dan is not left unscathed too, And so is Dan, Chloe and Lucifer are just friends, Chloe is going to make him pay for it, Gen, I Tried, I did my best, Lucifer is a Little Shit, Oh Come All Ye Faithful Fic Exchange, Other, Payback, The poor boys, This actually sounds funnier in my head
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-23
Updated: 2016-12-23
Packaged: 2018-09-11 08:17:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8971522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloudXMK/pseuds/CloudXMK
Summary: This is for the 'Oh Come All Ye Faithful' Secret Santa Fic Exchange. Its Christmas and Lucifer's practically having a field day over the jolly month. Nitpicking over every tradition he sees and complaining about them nonstop to an irate Chloe Decker until he notices a certain shrub among the sales reminding him of a certain tradition. A little tradition he wouldn't mind participating in at all.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Wolfgirl4vr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfgirl4vr/gifts).



> I was in a bit of tough spot trying to make this one work but I managed to do it. As for the prompt, its a non-shipper/no Deckerstar prompt and the keyword is 'mistletoe' for Sarah! I just rated the fic mature because of a few choice words but other than that I hope you'll enjoy it!

Lucifer’s eye twitched for the umpteenth time as loud Christmas carols blasted overhead in the shopping mall that he and Chloe were now in, attempting to swim through the sea of frustrated adults and crying children, and shopping for absurdly highly priced Christmas items that weren’t even such good quality and were bound to either land up in storage or in the dumpster later after the whole jolly hype had died down.

A comment Lucifer couldn’t help but share out loud with the Detective, not caring if others had heard him. Chloe had then silenced him with a sharp glare but that didn’t stop him from grumbling under his breath about how odd it was that humans celebrate his half-brother’s birthday with such materialistic views and think it’s an excuse for them to sin all month long.

“I don’t get how decorating a tree with those horrid ornaments have to do with celebrating my half-brother’s birthday, Detective.” Lucifer grumbled.

Chloe sighed for the last time, feeling a headache coming on. She wondered again why it was a good idea to bring Lucifer along with her for Christmas shopping. Oh yeah. It was because he insisted on going with her and Dan had to go pick Trixie up.

“You wanted to come with me remember, Lucifer?”

“Yes I know that, Detective. But I just don’t get all of this.” He points to the large heavily decorated tree in the middle of the mall. “To me, all of this just seems to be a waste. That tree is surely going to end up as paper or probably in the middle of a landfill once all of this is done so why bother?”

“I don’t know, Lucifer. Look, if you want to leave just go but if you’re staying could you please at least help me out for once and not complain the entire time?”

“Fine.”

The two then head into a store selling wreaths and shrubbery when Lucifer saw several mistletoes on display in the back. His lips quirked up into a wicked grin. He had learned about the little tradition of people kissing each other if they stepped under a mistletoe, and many a time had he been one of the lucky chaps of this strange tradition.

A tradition he didn’t mind one bit.

Seeing Chloe being kept busy by the salesperson, Lucifer quickly seized the moment and heads over to the back, taking a mistletoe and hurrying to the cashier to pay for it before Chloe could see it.

He was going to have a lot of fun with this little shrub.

 

* * *

 

The small party was in full swing and Trixie was just delighted bouncing around and drinking hot chocolate after helping her mother, Mazikeen, and Lucifer set up the decorations. Lucifer had been planning on leaving as soon as the last of the decorations had been hung up but Trixie’s insistence on him staying led to one thing and then another along with Maze’s taunts which got to him and now he was here drinking hot chocolate as well.

He had tolerated the whole marathon of Christmas movies and the decorations until his Mother, his brother, and Dan decided to show up.

That immediately dampened his mood.

So here he was on the couch looking every bit like a petulant little boy watching his Mother with narrowed, calculative eyes. He didn’t know why she was here in Chloe’s home in the first place or what her game was (which made him a tad nervous not that he’d let it show) and he wasn’t going to let her hurt Chloe. Not on his watch.

Lovers they may not be but Lucifer cared deeply for the detective, seeing her as a good friend of his, despite the constant flirts and teasing remarks he would throw out at the detective.

“So, Lucifer. When are you going to hang up that mistletoe and get that kiss from Decker?” Maze asked, appearing by his side in the blink of an eye.

Lucifer’s eyes widened. How did she know? Oh, who was he kidding? This was his right-hand demon and family. Maze would know what he or anyone else was up to. She always had a keen eye for secrets.

“Later when my Mother is gone. I don’t want to give her any ideas about me falling for a human and throwing a fit about it.”

“But what better way than to stick it up to that bitch than seeing her son kissing a human. I mean that would be pretty hilarious.”

“And cause a scene? Maze, as much as I adore you, now isn’t the right time.”

“Or are you scared of Danny boy?”

“Scared? Of course not!” Lucifer huffed.

“Well then how about some good old-fashioned payback at him for kissing your Mother? And also sleeping with her? Or do you want me to show you the picture again?” Maze said with a smirk.

Lucifer shivered. “Oh Father no. I’d rather not.” Maze had showed him the picture after Dan’s little confession and had promptly (although he would never admit it) threw up in his mouth a little bit. That was something he would never wish to witness ever again.

But paying back some good ole revenge for what Dan did didn’t sound like a bad idea. Guilt swam inside him thinking of using Chloe like that just to throw it back in Dan’s face.

“I can’t do that to the Detective, Maze.”

The demon rolls her eyes. “If you’re not going to kiss her, I might as well do it for you.” She said, reaching inside his suit in the blink of an eye and took out the mistletoe.

“Wait what? Maze!”

Mazikeen ignored his cries and quickly made her way to the Detective. Now horrified, Lucifer got up from his seat and ran straight for Maze. He was not going to let her steal away his gift.

Before he could catch her, Mazikeen spun on her heel and Lucifer skidded to a stop right in front of Chloe with Maze now standing on top of a chair, holding the mistletoe over the two of them with a smirk on her face.

Oh that sly, witty demon.

Chloe looked up and turned slightly red when she saw the mistletoe hanging above them. “Lucifer what?”

“Um yes, Detective?”

“Lucifer.”

“Oh come on, Detective. Live a little. What’s the harm in a little kiss?” He said, trying to backtrack from his little moment.

“In front of everyone?” She hissed at him. “Really, Lucifer?”

Trixie was ecstatic but Charlotte and Amenadiel had quizzical looks no doubt confused as to how a piece of shrub could warrant for a kiss. Dan, however, had a horrified look on his face and that only made Chloe even more nervous. Oh, she was going to make him pay for this.

An idea quickly forming in her head, she smiles coyly at Lucifer with a playful glint in her eyes.

“So you want a kiss from me huh?” She asks, slinking up to Lucifer real close.

“Yes. Come now, Detective. Humor me.”

Chloe grinned and leaned in real close until her faces were inches away from Lucifer’s. His eyes fluttering shut, Lucifer expects Chloe’s lips meeting his not knowing of the sudden twist that she was going to pull on him.

Without even giving her ex a chance to ask let alone protest, she pulls away and pushes him towards Lucifer and their lips met roughly. Dan made what sounded like an embarrassed or horrified squeal causing Lucifer to open his eyes and he too cried out in shock and horror. His face immediately turned red as well as Dan’s and the two pulled away at breakneck speed, gagging and wiping their mouths with their sleeves, wrapping their arms around themselves trembling.

He had kissed the same mouth that had kissed his Mother and Lucifer paled at that. Oh Father. He kissed his own Mother!

Dan was horrified more so out of the fact that he had kissed his frenemy whose mouth had landed in goodness knows where and was on the verge of passing out on the floor.

Trixie, Chloe, and Mazikeen had all laughed hard at the two men and Mazikeen had even taken a quick snap of the two kissing. Oh she was going to keep it. Blackmail material after all is the best dealbreaker. Amenadiel and Charlotte were just stunned and had their mouths hanging open the entire time which only made the Chloe and Trixie laugh even harder until tears spilled down their faces. 

“You’re going to pay for that, Detective!” Lucifer cried out.

“Chloe why?” Dan too cried out.

Chloe never gave a proper answer, too busy laughing away at the two very embarrassed men.


End file.
